you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
