East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
