He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
