I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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