Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I love you. Go after that dick
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
