why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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