I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
