He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
