This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I wish I only lived at night.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
