just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
we're so committed to being not committed
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
