i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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