worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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