You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
