Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
