I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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