Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
