the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
