dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
