i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
