marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
My vagina is very pro this idea
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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