can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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