Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
