Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
try to milk me bitch
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
