Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
