no, he came in my armpit
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
