wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
