Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
