Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
