No stitches, just platelets and will power
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
