My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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