JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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