the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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