My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize