i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
