do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
