Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize
