Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
