she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
