I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize