I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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