mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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