he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
