so let's talk penis.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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