Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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