i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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