Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
