maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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