Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
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