Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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