I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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