I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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