it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
